I returned home from a two week trip and one of my plants appeared in distress. It looked wilted, it lacked its normal color, and simply appeared dim and upset. This plant was given to me by my dear friend, co-author, and colleague Emily Young. Emily and I launched a Trauma-Informed Personal Training Certification back in 2021 (It was a bit of a covid survival project at the time.) Our certification course launched in the Summer of 2021 and Emily gifted me a plant to commemorate the launch!
It has been seemingly happy in its little pot on my window sill for years. Emily would comment on it over the years, “how is that plant still alive and happy!” I noticed an overactive part of me trying to figure out what had happened when I returned home to it looking dim.
After years of easy care, I felt terrible for retrograde ignoring signs that she was not ok. Before, perhaps taking for granted how “easy” it had become to care for. Then something clicked and the grief and curious synchronicity of life hit me- you see I had just expressed to a family member how my “easy nature” growing up could have actually been a bit more, well just MORE since I was not a “naturally easy going child” but simply a child aware of what was permitted and accepted.
Was this plant really easy, or I had just assumed it was tended to until it yelled at me that it wasn’t?
Then it hit me- this was the first plant I had kept alive and attempted to grow in the office- I had relegated her to the first born easy daughter of plants. Damn.
Emily and I share the eldest daughter’s energy so I immediately sent her a photo of the plant this week and told her what had happened. In my update to her I shared that I had moved the plant to a different window sill in the hallway with other plant friends. Her leaves would not stand alone and so I propped them up with the pots of the others, and the window helped hold the other side of her leaves and then I watered her lightly and talked to her about having friends and not being alone to hold herself up. Then I cried.
I have really leaned into the help and support of my partner, community, colleagues, and friends in the last 5 years. My responsible eldest daughter’s energy is forever present, but so is the softness of being held by others. My dear plant’s leaves are now standing back up after being propped and supported last week. She is looking strong in her roots and Emily and I agree, she could use a new pot and a soil update this spring- after all it’s been 5 years and she has spoken that she needs a little more tending to. (Don’t we all!)
**Emily Young is mentioned in this post and she will be a collaborator on future Embodied Connection shares. She is a fellow eldest daughter and plant mama, she will share more on embodied movements and connections to build within ourselves with more intention and joy. So excited to share more in the future!